Posted on July 20, 2017 · Posted in Books
Jules and I were so delighted to be asked onto Loose Women to talk about the inspiration behind my new novel Best Laid Plans.
It tells the story of an autistic boy’s search for love and intimacy – highlighting the fact that when it comes to sex, we all have special needs right? The novel is a comedic confection but the opening chapter in which a middle-aged, middle-class Mum gets arrested while kerb-crawling to pick up a prostitute for her autistic son, is based on reality.
The interview was pre-recorded, and went really well. Jules , who plays Jason on BBC’s Holby City, was both charming and illuminating (he’s a great campaigner for autistic charities) but, unfortunately, half way through the screened interview, just as Julius started to speak, the sound evaporated. What’s worse, viewers presumed it was because Jules had said something inappropriate, which did cast autistic people in a bad light.
So, just to set the record straight, here is the full interview. And, as I’m sure you’ll see, Jules was poised and articulate and also, quite funny. I couldn’t be more proud of him and of what he’s achieved. And for helping me to promote not just my new novel, Best Laid Plans, (she says, dropping her own name!) but also for helping to take the stigma out of autism.
Enjoy.
You can watch the full interview here
What do women really want in bed? Breakfast. Oh, and a good book. If you’re looking for a funny, frivolous yet feisty new read, do slip between my covers. Satisfaction guaranteed.
Here’s a selection of scribblings in which I peel down to my emotional underwear – a psychological striptease that occasionally reveals all.
I think women are each other’s human Wonderbras – uplifting, supportive and making each other look bigger and better.
If he wants breakfast, tell him to sleep in the kitchen.
Men think monogamy is something you make dining tables out of.
Many marriages break up for religious reasons – he thinks he’s a god and she doesn’t.
Love prepares you for marriage the way needlepoint prepares you for round-the-world solo yachting.
Boys will be boys, and so will a load of middle-aged boys who should know better.
Ladies who lynch.
No wife ever shot a husband while he was vacuuming.
I think therefore I’m divorced.
All husbands think they’re Gods. If only their wives weren’t atheists.
Happy wife = happy life.
I couldn’t ask for a better husband… as much as I’d bloody well like to.
Statistically, 100% of divorces begin with marriage.
Marriage is nature’s way of promoting masturbation.
Marriage is a fun-packed, frivolous activity – only occasionally resulting in death.
It’ll be an amicable split. You’ll both get 50 % of the acrimony.
A new invention is required. The monogamous husband. Patent Pending.
How Do I Hate Thee? Let me Count the Ways.
My wedding vows didn’t say To Love, Hoover and Obey.
I’m Having my period so can therefore legally kill you.
You are going to enjoy this marriage, even if I have to divorce you to do so.
A happy marriage is like an orgasm – many of them are faked.
All this emphasis on women faking orgasms, but what about men faking foreplay?
Why do men like intelligent women? Because opposites attract.
Why don’t women tell jokes? Because we marry them.
What does a woman really want in bed? Breakfast.
For women, life is full of lies – I mean doctors maintain that wrinkles don’t hurt.
Legal aid cuts prove that the Tories believe a person is innocent until proven destitute.
Sexist men are so stupid it makes you want to take the ‘men’ out of Mensa.
If a man ever tells you that women fall at his feet – it’s only because he gets them drunk first.
A woman must always fight back. Never just lie back and think of Canberra.
The best cure for menopause is the toy boy diet. A case of having Your Beefcake and Eating It Too.
I don’t fake orgasms. I’m faking being six foot one and seven stone.
Trophy wives tarnish quickly and then get left on the shelf.
Lawyers work 24/7. The partners of lawyers suffer from a bad case of subpoena envy.
Most shrinks should book an appointment with themselves.
The question on the minds of most women is – why doesn’t chocolate go straight to your boobs?
Don’t fall for a man’s puppy dog look… Just get him wormed.
It’s been so long since a man has touched me, not even medical science will want my body.
My top tip for keeping your youth? Lock him in the pool house.
4 Comments
Hi
I am writing to invite Kathy Lette to speak at an event I am organising which will take place in Central London on Thursday 1st February 2017 between 1.00 pm and 4.30 pm.
I am a solicitor who specialises in Special Educational Needs Law with my colleague, Miss Imelda Brennan and for the last 20 years we have helped parents and carers of children and young adults with special educational needs. Each year we organise an Experts’ Forum inviting professionals who work in this area, charities and representatives from special schools to attend. It is an informal event and approximately 40 professionals attend. Previously Dame Tanny Grey-Thompson attended and spoke about her personal experience within the educational system which was very well received by the audience.
For the event in 2018, I would like to invite Ms Lette to attend and speak about her experience as a parent of a young adult who has a diagnosis of autism and I would be delighted if she could join us and share her experience with the attendees. I would also be delighted if Jules could attend and speak about his experience of working as an actor on Holby City.
I look forward to hearing from you regarding our request and, if you require any further information, please do not hesitate to contact me.
sorry. I missed this. x
Dear Kathy,
I have high end Aspergers and always been single. I 46.
I considering a Sex worker,but want to make right choice when searching internet for local Sex workers. Is street prostitutes a bad idea? I read internet and believe independent escort is best at around £100 per hour.
What is your advice?
There are some sex workers that are specifically trained to support Autistic people. Are you in Australia or UK?